Every little thing brings up memories of things long past the point of salvaging.
Every little thing.
Every little damn thing.
I'm so tired. Tired of trying to move forward one day and being dragged back into the past the next. Tired of trying to move on. Tired of telling myself I've moved on. Tired of pretending to everyone else I've moved on. Why can't I just get to the place I'm supposed to move on to and get this all over with? It's been ten months for crying out loud. Ten freaking months. A freaking child could've been born in that time.
Some might think starting a new relationship helps one move on. I secretly think that's bogus. How do you concentrate on your new relationship when you're still affected by the past? I know someone who's in that situation; the girl isn't too happy when the boy gets all emotional about his ex.
There's so much to learn about being secure in myself, about appreciating my strengths, about accepting who I am. But I feel like I'm walking around in circles, a hopeless man in the desert of brokenheartedness.
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